TRUTH THAT I STAND ON.......

   

The last few weeks, I have been doing my best to focus on what IS true. What I KNOW in my heart to be TRUTH and what I STAND on.  People ask us all of the time either WHY we adopted when we already had several kids, or WHAT adopting older kids is like....
      After the hardest year of our lives, thus far, and I mean, HARD, hard stuff, I have been reflecting back on what this year has taught me and what I KNOW to be TRUE.  You see in the pictures, the kids are smiles, but in 'real' life, that is not how it always plays out.  There are a lot of tears, a lot of fights, and a lot of grieving in outward ways and in ways that don't let anyone in.
One expresses and one doesn't.  Counseling for 7 months (weekly) hasn't done a whole lot.  Right now, we are looking at some different options.  For one, we have taken a break from counseling and plan on in the future, changing to a different counselor.  Right now, we are mainly looking for a way to do some bio-feedback to try and heal their brains and give them a chance to move forward from their pasts.  (More on this in a near-future post).
So, as we continue to walk on and pray for wisdom and grace, as well as make decisions as to how to help them best, here are the truths we are choosing to stand on:

"Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long." ~Psalm 25:5

1.God is in the hard stuff:

     He is here; he is walking with us on this journey.

"Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”
~Deuteronomy 31:6

I see him in glimpses of the light that come breaking through the shadows on the days when I think the fog is so thick that we will never get to the other side.  I see Him through things that family and friends encourage me with.  I see him in brief but beautiful moments in time when I see my kids in the way that their Savior sees them.  In this, and through the small moments, when God gives me a glimpse of the healing that is slowly taking place in their little lives, I see Him because He is here in all of this.

2. He placed us here:

Then Mordecai told them to reply to Esther, “Do not think to yourself that in the king's palace you will escape any more than all the other Jews. For if you keep silent at this time, relief and deliverance will rise for the Jews from another place, but you and your father's house will perish. And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” 
~Esther 4:16.

This was no surprise to Him.  He knew that Haile and Beti would need a family and He knew that that family would be us.  He hand-picked us for this job and he prepared the way for them to be our kids. So, none of this, none of the hard days, and the challenging moments, are surprising to Him.
There are times, many days, when I think that he picked the wrong person because my human nature wants to over-ride the truth.  The enemy loves to get in my face every chance he can to remind me that I am not cut out for this immense job! But when I take a step back, I see we were made for them and they were made for us.  He put them right where they are suppose to be, as hard as this is to see on some days.

 

"God sets the lonely in families..." Psalms 68

As much as Satan would love for us to believe that this isn't true, or that we are not equipped to do the job set before us, this isn't the truth. That is a lie from the pit of hell.
The truth is, WE are not equipped to do this, only through HIM will we be able to make it.  Only through him, will they be lead to Christ, so that HE can redeem their lives.  Because only HE can, not us.

"Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour." 1 Peter 5:8

3. He is growing us:

We are growing far more then would have ever been possible, if we had said no to His plan for our lives; But because we said yes, we are hanging on to Him, and being stretched so much, and that is right where He wants us.

He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.” ~Jeremiah 17:8

4. This life isn’t about Us and OUR plans, it’s about HIM:

Ultimately, Christ is on the throne and he sees the beginning to the end, and the end from the beginning.  This adoption has changed us, it has changed our family.  We have had to give things up, we have had friendships shift, and we have even lost some friends.  Our time is precious; we just don’t have much time.  There are days when I feel like we are barely treading water.  Even after almost a year and a half home, we are still adjusting BIG TIME.  We are still in shock and "survival" mode because that is what bringing two kids into your family that have had 6 and 12 years of trauma is all about.  But you know what, it is all for His glory. 

Everyone asks us, “why did you adopt”?....THIS is why, because HE asked us to.  It is in His will, His plan and for His purposes…and because HE IS WRITING THIS STORY.

“..declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things not yet done, saying, ‘My counsel shall stand, and I will accomplish all my purpose,..” Isaiah 46:10

The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance”. 2 Peter 3:9

“Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it”.  Matthew 10:39

“The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps”.
Proverbs 16:9

5. He very well is sovereign and just may give us ‘More than we can handle’

God never said once in the Bible that “He won’t give us more then we can handle”.  This is a much-quoted myth.  It isn’t in there, not once.  YES, he WILL give us more then we can handle, but He will be there WITH us. He will never leave us, He is walking with us.  This life will be hard, and for some it will be harder than others, but He won’t leave us, and through whatever we walk through, HE is sovereign, he is always in control and is always on the throne.  

       I have said it before – God didn’t call us to do the “easy”.  He didn’t say, follow me and life will be a piece of cake.  He didn’t say to just do what the Bible says and life will be just like you want it to be.  God isn't a genie to just grant each wish we have.  Because if he were, we would have such royally messed up lives.  You see, WE don't know what is best for us, but He does.

No, that isn’t how we grow in Him, it isn’t how we become more like Jesus and show others Jesus.  He has asked us to give sacrificially, to love with abandon and to follow Him.  IT IS HARD.

Giving up an “easy” life is hard stuff.  It isn’t fun a lot of the time, and it isn’t smooth sailing.  It is work, it is rocky ground and it is taking one step forward and then falling back down on our butts.

But the difference is, with Jesus, when we fall, we are falling into His arms and He is catching us.  He is our anchor, he is our rock and that is the truth that we hold to, and friends, it is ALL that matters.  Because ultimately, this is HIS STORY – HE IS WRITING THE STORY!  He is writing this, we are not.  So we could choose to take the easy route, but that wouldn’t be what he would ask us to do, and then we wouldn’t be living in obedience to Him.

 

So when people ask us why we would adopt, why we would give us our life to help two kids and give them a family...THIS is why and it is the answer.

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." ~Joshua 1:9

If you need more clarification on this-I love this guys writing on the subject-check it out, it really explains things of this common mis-truth: http://www.ministryu.org/god-always-gives-us-more-than-we-can-handle/

6. He is orchestrating the outcome and I have to let go of the it! :

It is His, it is all His so LET GO OF THE OUTCOME is my new line to live by.  I have to, because I am realizing so much that the outcome doesn’t matter, it is what we do now, how we live now and the decisions we make.  For you see, HE brought them to us, He knew we would be their family and we have to just live each day the best that we can and let the rest play out into His plan- because, He is writing the story-

THIS IS MY NEW BRACELET- I WEAR IT EACH DAY TO REMIND ME TO :

        "LET GO OF THE OUTCOME ~ HE'S WRITING THE STORY"

 

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. II Corinthians 12:9

"But these things I plan won't happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed”. Habakkuk 2:3

      This song meant a lot to me while going through the adoption, because not everyone was supportive of us adopting.  I had to listen to 'The Voice Of Truth' from the One that was in charge of this all then, and I have to listen to His Voice each day now, as we continue to walk with these kids and the challenges each day brings.