ANTICIPATION. . . . .

anticipation [ænˌtɪsɪˈpeɪʃən]
n
1. the act of anticipating; expectation, premonition, or foresight

This is the word that fills our minds every -or at least every weekday of the week (when AGCI is open) as we wonder on each and every day, WILL OUR PHONE RING TODAY WITH THE WONDERFUL NEWS OF OUR BABY GIRL?
When the phone does ring-we all jump slightly until we know who it is. How long will this go on we all wonder? The weekends are hard because we know that our agency doesn't make referral calls on sat or sun. But by Monday, hope is renewed that this might be the day or at least the week. It could be any day that we get THAT phone call, but then again, we had friends that sat at #1 on the baby girls list for 2 months before their "call" finally came.
Only one knows and since it is in His hands, we have to try and trust that it is all well. Here are some verses that I am trying to focus on as we wait.

It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed. (Deuteronomy 31:8)

Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord guards the city, the guard keeps watch in vain. It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives sleep to his beloved. (Psalm 127:1-2)

Be still, and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10a

It is hard to believe that just like in labor, we are waiting to see our babies face and yet, this labor seems to have gone on long enough! I feel like I am 9 months pregnant and am just done-that feeling of you can't do this another day-is here! Essentially, it has been 9 months of pregnancy because 9 months ago, we got on the waiting list at #44. But, we did have months of preparation before even getting on that wait list, but still-this pregnancy is OVERDUE! :-)
I can't help but think about her each and everyday-how old will she be and what will she look like are 2 of my most pressing questions.
I am also so anxious to hear her story-where did she come from, what was her family situation, etc.. As I think about this, I know that it will be hard emotionally dealing with the circumstances around her being taken to the orphanage and delivered then to Hannah's Hope (AGCI orphanage in Addis). Someone will have to give her up in order for us to get a new daughter-that is hard, very hard to think about. I try and put myself in that situation-where I can't care for one of my children and have NO other resources-NO family that could help because they are in the same situation we are, NO friends that are in a position any better than me to help, NO government assistance like there is here, NOTHING- and it is hard because my American mind just can't go there-my mind stops short-we can't comprehend it, it is too tragic. These are things I think about and how in this life, we will never understand why this happens and how it is that a parent has to leave her child at an orphanage, but I hope that even if just for a moment each day when they think of their child after we bring her home, they know she is getting love, food, a home and Jesus and this gives them some peace about their horrendous decision.
Please continue to pray for Abby and for us as we continue to wait-love you all-Amber